niedziela, 3 lutego 2013
ChujWamWDupeAniolki2
February 4 - Fuck You In Dupe Angels 2
I was in bed for the day. I got sick like a pig. I read something there but not much. I didn't feel like anything. I ate even when my stomach hurt, which on the one hand gave me pleasure and on the other hand I felt guilty ....
I found a textbook on Neurology. I read a little so that I will know how to simulate the necessary neurological tests.
sobota, 2 lutego 2013
ChujWamWDupeAniolki
February 3 - Get in your ass Angels!
Dream: a narrow psychiatric hospital in a new market. Rooms like wood. My mouth closed after eating a saffron milk cake. Although I could speak very sensitively, I couldn't.
Today what happened. Full of anger at my father. I watched a little dr. House. I was doing nothing. I talked to Kaja a little. So I wanted to tell her what I feel, what I think, but on the other hand I wanted to be alone, I don't want to have anyone.
I desperately visit the post office every now and then to receive some comforting message from someone.
Huj Wam in Dupe Aniolki. I'm reading your scribbles, god fucking what a fuck !!!
I found a meditation center on the internet. Interestingly, it is still located at 14/17 Mostowa Street in Krakow, just like a Krakow Zen center.
I wrote an email to them and wanted to come in and become their student. We'll see what happens.
In dr. Housie was a blonde girl, pretty pretty who felt no pain. There was also the pianist Genius, who became a genius pianist after a car accident.
All day long I thought about my father. How I fucking hate him. How much I want revenge !!!
piątek, 1 lutego 2013
We are resuming Rhodiole
Late sleep, stopping running, Rhodiola, a new mind game - great. A walk, a dinner party, cheesecake, cold needles in the heels and spine.
Reading the diary, attempted break-in at the university hospital, Dr. house viewing.
February 2 - We are renewing Rhodiola
In the morning I did not exercise, I did not run, I did not train my mind. Blogo I was lying in bed. I made myself free from this strict routine. I was lying in the nonsense of life.
I resumed Rhodiole today.
I watched dr. House. To think that a year ago I had such great talk as he did, and now I can't get it back.
I have installed 2 mind training programs on android. I tested one - I liked it a lot, really cool games.
I ate dinner at 12 and I was full of sandwiches. A real stew in the pot. Feeling guilty, regret caused me to go for a walk to burn it all down. I met Patryk Kuc in the car. I was walking exceptionally across the river and the end of Nowy Świat.
Today I listened to my diary from January and February 2011 when I was the happiest man on earth. I felt a bit of guilt when I listened to Kasia's thread. I feel like an asshole - I hurt her. I would love to make it up to her. Sorry, Kasia ...
Today I was afraid of cold needles in my heels and spine ...
Today I watched a few episodes of dr. House. It was about a girl who was a dwarf who needed growth hormone, about Fireboy who had broken heart syndrome - and I associated it with myself. It was also about a little girl whose hands were almost amputated.
In the evening I was talking to Esther. Somehow I was sad, I played sad music that helped me drown in my sadness and lit a small lamp. I tried to contact Kaja on Skype but she did not reply to me. She turned off Skype.
I tried to break into the University Hospital sql injection, but unfortunately I am not a hacker. In a moment, another attempt at meditation. Yes, another attempt will probably fail. From today I changed my breathing technique to 1: 4: 2
czwartek, 31 stycznia 2013
Courage
01 February - Courage
Nothing special happened during the day. I was not running for my feet for fear. I'll be training tomorrow. I read a little bit of esoteric psychology and finished reading it the joy of a dangerous life. Throughout the day I was engrossed in books.
Mom today is cutting her finger into juicers.
A moment ago now in the evening she went to Morczyna for some reason. Probably from Tat.
I'm going to meditate in a moment. I will use the 3-finger technique again, but I will lie on my stomach because I feel that this position will be perfect for me today. I will use the technique of self-hypnosis and I will imagine the golden aura that will give me energy. In this position, the muscles will be taut, which will allow me to imagine the golden aura more easily, like in DragonBall.
I had a lot of sweets and cips and sandwiches at night, although I did not want to eat ... What did I do, this feeling of guilt again. In my head, metlik and chaos: learn to live without food, no, it is enough to keep a 14-hour fast to stay healthy and slim, tomorrow I will be hungry if we are gone .... God ... What to do. I feel bigos in my stomach, I've mixed it up too much. I'm sorry my body. Sorry .... I'm lost in my life and I don't know what to do ...
When will I learn to meditate?
3 Fingers
Dream: I remember a dream that I was at the Laryngologist's in Rabka. I asked him to prescribe me because he helps me a lot. He agreed and prescribed some new prescription.
January 31 - 3 fingers.
At night Meditation method of self-hypnosis + Radio. Watching all thoughts as they arise. I was kind of on the side. In addition, my hands were exceptionally placed on the bed and not on my hips as I had recently done. I clenched my hands as if in 3 fingers which actually made meditation easier. This trick was prompted by a user.
In the morning training 15 repetitions
Today I read a book about healing.
I have prepared a healing decree necessary to heal the soul. A set of super affirmations that I developed myself.
I ate in the afternoon. Until you are too full. Indeed, abundant food makes you sleepy.
Has anything else important happened today? I read Radoslaw Balwierz about creativity and took notes. I need to get my creative mind back.
I also called a psychotronic school in Krakow. I was supposed to call the director after 6 p.m. but I didn't want to. At that time, I practiced and somehow postponed it.
środa, 30 stycznia 2013
Warning Asu
January 30 - Aseu Warning.
Bronek, I don't want to interfere, but something tells me that I should tell you something, it's as if someone gave me a thought and wanted me to pass it on to you. It's so strange (...)
I thought, and it actually came to me that your father is actually a victim of lies, that you both suffered a lot, although you probably more and he wanted to protect you too, the system got you into a trap ... I'm very sorry that it happened and I apologize if I said too much, if these words offended or touched you.
These are the words that ester welcomed me during today's conversation around 1:00 or 3:00 when I woke up. It is allegedly from the angel Aseu. Ester checked that some sources say it is an angel, another and a fallen angel or a demon. In any case, I liked these words ... Which, however, does not change the fact that my father is still hating my father a lot !!!
Throughout the day, due to fear of feet, I did not run. Only around 9:00 am I supposed to go for a run, but I was afraid of running. It was also when I started walking with breathing. I jumped to the post office and returned home. At the post office, I picked up a boxing bandage.
Today I read The Book of Immediate Healing. I tested quite a lot of techniques on myself. One of the first was the Healing Blanket - I thought it helped my feet, although later I was still living in fear that the pain would return. I feel my feet "crack" and the traveling pain / chlamydia began to cling to more damaged areas.
Besides, I also tested touch and imagination. I imagined a bit that I was kissing and I love Kaja. This is a nice visualization. Perhaps I will use it now for evening chakra work. When I was cold, I imagined myself exercising on armrests. I felt warm. After such visualization, I was proud of myself, calm and composed. Cool!
The affirmation thread was very useful. I created my own beauty, thanks to which I had good mental and physical well-being for the whole day: "My body is enjoying tremendous health like never before." I blessed my body, thanked him. Blessings are similar to affirmations, but you are thankful for what your body is doing. These techniques, although discreet, I felt they worked :)
Affirmations plus visualization of the exercises gave some sort of peace for a good part of the day. Like after breathing exercises or meditation.
Oh, at night, then in the morning when I was doing the breathing exercises, my mom came in and fucked me up that I was breathing so loudly.
Today I also watched a movie on YouTube - Cruel people - leaders of sects. Until I wanted to have super powers myself, but only because at the moment to send my father to a mental hospital. Hypnotize and manipulate it!
This is probably all the most important things today.
What I learned today: Visualization and some healing techniques.
poniedziałek, 28 stycznia 2013
Electro Acupuncture
January 29 - ElektroAkupunktura
A day written on time. I got up quite early, somewhere between 00:00 and 01:00. I woke up, did some mind exercises, and went to sleep again. I think it is due to the fact that I went to sleep quite early the previous day, around 21:00. 4 hours of sleep perfectly regenerated my body.
After 1-2 hours of such mind / awakening exercise, I went to sleep.
I was still waking up / getting up. In the morning I went to Rafal Pawlik at 8:30. As soon as I entered his block, he knew it was me. As he claimed, he did not expect anyone else. Today we explained a lot about what we think of each other. We also changed places to see what it's like to be in a different place.
Return home, quick breakfast and departure to Nowy Targ. Today I had an appointment with a Rheumatologist. Today I was terribly worried about my feet - probably too much effort from running. She feels new lumps growing on her ....
Coming back to visiting dr. Feathers - I lied that something hurt me, that there are cramps in the groin etc ... I lied. I don't know if I did the right thing. I learned that my hip might hurt my knee. I also left the original consultation result by Dr. Sebastianowicz. This is my tactical mistake, but I thought to myself - it's alright. One day I will ask at registration to make photocopies of me. I made an appointment with Dr. Pierzg� on March 20, she said that she would be able to do treatments then.
I went to the Buffet, earlier I bought grapefruit juice in the shop at the entrance, I drank it in the buffet. Being in the buffet, I was thinking about Wojciech Panz, hoping that I would meet him, and on the other hand, having a little fear of meeting him ...
Today I received an electroacupuncture device, but seeing such a large book on this subject I don't want to read it. I still think of an ordinary book - I don't want to read it.
Today I was worried about my feet. I can feel new bumps growing at my heel. What to do? Gotta get some neurological diagnostics. How neurologists analyze such things and then I can go to a neurologist who will make the diagnosis I know that the footwear and spine are bad. I KNOW IT, I AM SURE OF IT. But the neurological tests suck! From your difficult condition, she can heal you like in the Department of Social Humiliation.
At 4 p.m. I made an appointment with Łukasz Lopata. I gave him my book - Balance of body and mind.
Today I was not running. I'm not okay with it. I ate 3 slices for the night and then a little sweetness. Feelings of guilt again and ate a bad meal.
I have read Tombak's Road to Health. It is like a conglomerate of readings that I have already read. I enjoyed reading this lesson. Somehow I'm afraid to move forward and read other books, I preferred to go back a bit. I do not know why, maybe because reading the book about bioenergotherapy recommended by Wampirek I have some strange conviction in me that I will not learn it anyway? I do not know.
Subskrybuj:
Posty (Atom)
-
April 11 - Help for Patients injured in the result of a doctor's error. I woke up around 2:00 am. I went to have a drink and checked ...
-
December 9 - Today 2 dreams around 6:00. Holes as in the matrix (I wrote so, but I don't remember what's going on anymore). Rafal...
-
I'm a little fucking scary. late night. I have wasted a lot of time. I'm stuck together. I hope this dedication will not be wasted...