Donate Blood

February 7 - Donate Blood Sleep: taking blood from Marta. Marta stuck needles in the wrong. In the morning, I woke up around 5:30 but of course I was still lying in bed. I got up in the morning, brewed a thermos with herbs, prepared a pillow for sitting, ate a light breakfast and went to the bus stop. I got on the Red bus, a moment later Marta joined. We went to the new market together. When we got out, I forgot to take my gloves with me. First, we went to the labor office which was located at the back of the hospital. Very nice clean. However, we quickly left and headed towards the blood donation station. I think I saw Rite Jozwiakowska on the way. I even thought about her, I was a bit afraid of contact with her. While we were there, we filled out the questionnaire. I mentioned that butcher's disease and that I pose a risk of infectious diseases. Ladies reading this poll were a little scared. I tried to keep myself calm. I was controlling my breathing. I was also a little nervous about what it will be. Numerous questions about the butcher, the doctor then examined me. Throat, eyes, glands, she said fine. She was probably a little scared by the pressure of 160 / xx, but she said it was nervous :) My blood was drawn. When I was still looking at what was typed into the computer - my case of the butcher was described. In some qualifications, I think I got a red -1 instead of a green one. hehe 8 chocolates, juice and canned food as a reward. I went out and ate some chocolate in the corridor. Earlier, the ladies also treated me to tea. We moved towards the gallery. We walked a slightly different way through the cemetery. We went out through the halls and into the gallery. There we missed 1 bus, for the second we had to run to the stop. We made it. Home later, nothing special. I played a bit of these stick insects. Being on the bus, I plunged into the world of imagination. I imagined how I was finally in the hospital in Nowy Targ, I found dr. House z Nowa Sól and I dismiss him, saying: I'm fine, I'm healthy. I'm fine ... These my fantasies and dark imaginations lasted quite a long time, most of the journey until I started talking to Mart. At home, I tested Rebrithing a little while I slept. I ate a total of 3 chocolates today, a hearty dinner of 7 slices. This remorse again. In addition, my feet hurt a lot today ...: ((Terrible, maybe I exaggerated, but the pain is quite clear. I'm afraid of this pain) To ease the pain, I soaked them in cold water with affirmations. After getting wet, however, I got a slight cramp in my lower legs. I forgot to warm my feet at the end and hence the cramp. But I thought to myself - no panic. We will use something new. I have tested the fast repetition of affirmations over and over: my legs are hot. But something was working poorly, I just kept repeating like a parrot. I wasn't sure it would work. I changed my auto-suggestions to: my calves are hot as fire. A slightly sharper tone of the voice, and the word fire somewhere in my consciousness and in my subconscious, produced fire in my feet. Ah, this pain stop ... I also tested a bit of rebritning today. It was supposed to be classic breathing, but it turned into Rebritning. Oh, at 3 p.m. after lunch, I went to buses. I got my gloves back. I saw the guy and he was proud of himself and he could help me :) Thanks mate! :) Something else important regarding the imagination http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSgcixeadn8 I'm listening to it now. There was a story from Majin Vegeta, this music made me hate. I had such stupid imaginations that I was entering Skawinska, stabbing my own blood in the shoulder of a Marksman, and hypnotizing him by making a plant out of him. Markiewicz falls into madness, a psychological shock caused by hypnosis, and my infected blood ... Blackmailing doctors that if they want, let them save their most outstanding specialist. I leave them my notes and my observations on this strange unknown disease. Act. for him they certainly did everything to save him ... I haven't had such visions for a long time. It really is a long time since I plunged into the world of imagination. It moved me to a completely different world, when I was happy and lived with my grandfather. Imagination... Ah, those feet, I'm scared. What to do now? Rebritning, auto-suggestion ?? Right to sleep, maybe start with 5 minutes of auto-suggestion and then Rebritning. Oh, they wrote back to me today from the Shambala Zen Center. I have declared that I will come on Sunday 15:40. I think I only had 20 zlotys left for the trip to Krakow. I will have to go down the bus so that I can stay a little bit.

ChujWamWDupeAniolki4

February 6 - Fuck You In Dupe Angels 4 It continues the series from the Chuj Wam W Dupe Aniolki 4 series I didn't exercise in the morning, I didn't feel like it. Sometime before noon, Uncle Rafal called. He asked me for help in creating a website. I felt so valued, I would like to create a website for him and I will position it. I noticed how my psyche functioned differently then. I forgot about revenge on my father, I plunged into my dreams just like when I lived with my grandfather. I imagined the conversation with Rafal, when I am with him, we talk about these topics, when I know bioenergy therapies and I help them with their health problems. As I flash medical knowledge and they admire me. I imagined it all for some time. In addition, I have played this game related to stick ninja for a long time today. Great little game. My fingers hurt from playing. Today I was at PPU Zdrojowa to register for treatments. I have to wait until this is sent to the fund, a letter will come to me and I can have treatments. I started watching a movie about the spine a bit, but somehow I didn't want to watch it for a long time. I also read the book, or rather read its half of the Bioenergotherapist's Guide, but there is probably not much about bioenergotherapy, but there is a lot about natural methods of treatment. I took some notes.

ChujWamWDupeAniolki3

February 5 - Fuck You In Dupe Angels 3 Yesterday was written with a delay Dream: I had a dream with a psychiatric hospital in the new market again and again. I dreamed that I had registered to the hospital. Discussion with the nurse why I waited for 1.5 months with registration. In the morning I went to Rafal Pawlik's. What I remember from our conversation is about a dream where blood is dripping from my right eye. I didn't do anything for the day. I was afraid of new cold needles in my head. I was afraid of cold needles on my feet and the heels of the spine. I passed in bed. In addition, I was playing this cool little game with the guy. Super game. I listened to the diary from March. I didn't even train my mind, I didn't want to.

ChujWamWDupeAniolki2

February 4 - Fuck You In Dupe Angels 2 I was in bed for the day. I got sick like a pig. I read something there but not much. I didn't feel like anything. I ate even when my stomach hurt, which on the one hand gave me pleasure and on the other hand I felt guilty .... I found a textbook on Neurology. I read a little so that I will know how to simulate the necessary neurological tests.

ChujWamWDupeAniolki

February 3 - Get in your ass Angels! Dream: a narrow psychiatric hospital in a new market. Rooms like wood. My mouth closed after eating a saffron milk cake. Although I could speak very sensitively, I couldn't. Today what happened. Full of anger at my father. I watched a little dr. House. I was doing nothing. I talked to Kaja a little. So I wanted to tell her what I feel, what I think, but on the other hand I wanted to be alone, I don't want to have anyone. I desperately visit the post office every now and then to receive some comforting message from someone. Huj Wam in Dupe Aniolki. I'm reading your scribbles, god fucking what a fuck !!! I found a meditation center on the internet. Interestingly, it is still located at 14/17 Mostowa Street in Krakow, just like a Krakow Zen center. I wrote an email to them and wanted to come in and become their student. We'll see what happens. In dr. Housie was a blonde girl, pretty pretty who felt no pain. There was also the pianist Genius, who became a genius pianist after a car accident. All day long I thought about my father. How I fucking hate him. How much I want revenge !!!

We are resuming Rhodiole

Late sleep, stopping running, Rhodiola, a new mind game - great. A walk, a dinner party, cheesecake, cold needles in the heels and spine. Reading the diary, attempted break-in at the university hospital, Dr. house viewing. February 2 - We are renewing Rhodiola In the morning I did not exercise, I did not run, I did not train my mind. Blogo I was lying in bed. I made myself free from this strict routine. I was lying in the nonsense of life. I resumed Rhodiole today. I watched dr. House. To think that a year ago I had such great talk as he did, and now I can't get it back. I have installed 2 mind training programs on android. I tested one - I liked it a lot, really cool games. I ate dinner at 12 and I was full of sandwiches. A real stew in the pot. Feeling guilty, regret caused me to go for a walk to burn it all down. I met Patryk Kuc in the car. I was walking exceptionally across the river and the end of Nowy Świat. Today I listened to my diary from January and February 2011 when I was the happiest man on earth. I felt a bit of guilt when I listened to Kasia's thread. I feel like an asshole - I hurt her. I would love to make it up to her. Sorry, Kasia ... Today I was afraid of cold needles in my heels and spine ... Today I watched a few episodes of dr. House. It was about a girl who was a dwarf who needed growth hormone, about Fireboy who had broken heart syndrome - and I associated it with myself. It was also about a little girl whose hands were almost amputated. In the evening I was talking to Esther. Somehow I was sad, I played sad music that helped me drown in my sadness and lit a small lamp. I tried to contact Kaja on Skype but she did not reply to me. She turned off Skype. I tried to break into the University Hospital sql injection, but unfortunately I am not a hacker. In a moment, another attempt at meditation. Yes, another attempt will probably fail. From today I changed my breathing technique to 1: 4: 2

Courage

01 February - Courage Nothing special happened during the day. I was not running for my feet for fear. I'll be training tomorrow. I read a little bit of esoteric psychology and finished reading it the joy of a dangerous life. Throughout the day I was engrossed in books. Mom today is cutting her finger into juicers. A moment ago now in the evening she went to Morczyna for some reason. Probably from Tat. I'm going to meditate in a moment. I will use the 3-finger technique again, but I will lie on my stomach because I feel that this position will be perfect for me today. I will use the technique of self-hypnosis and I will imagine the golden aura that will give me energy. In this position, the muscles will be taut, which will allow me to imagine the golden aura more easily, like in DragonBall. I had a lot of sweets and cips and sandwiches at night, although I did not want to eat ... What did I do, this feeling of guilt again. In my head, metlik and chaos: learn to live without food, no, it is enough to keep a 14-hour fast to stay healthy and slim, tomorrow I will be hungry if we are gone .... God ... What to do. I feel bigos in my stomach, I've mixed it up too much. I'm sorry my body. Sorry .... I'm lost in my life and I don't know what to do ... When will I learn to meditate?